7 tips for surviving family events these holidays
The holidays are a time for family, friends, and loved ones to get together and celebrate. However, for many people, the holiday season is also a time of stress and anxiety. If you’re dreading attending your family’s Christmas event or getting together with extended relatives, don’t worry—you’re not alone. Here are our 7 tips for surviving (and even enjoying) family events this holiday season.
Have realistic expectations
If you’re dreading spending time with your family, it’s important to set realistic expectations. Don’t expect that everyone will get along perfectly or that it will be conflict free. It’s normal for there to be some tension at family gatherings. Try to remember that not every moment will be perfect, but that’s okay. Focus on enjoying the time you do have together and try to make the best of it.
Be prepared
If you have critical or nosy relatives, be prepared for their questions and judgement about your life choices. Whether it’s about your job, your love life, or your plans for the future, know that you don’t have to answer any question that you’re not comfortable with. Simply change the subject or say that you would rather not talk about it. The important thing is that you don’t put yourself in a position where you’re feeling pressured or uncomfortable.
Take a break
Spending time with family can be overwhelming, especially if you have a large family or you don’t see them very often. It’s okay to not spend every moment with your family members.
If you start to feel overwhelmed, take a break! Step away from the group for a few minutes to gather your thoughts, step out for some fresh air, take a few minutes to yourself in a quiet room or have a nap. Take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that you can handle this.
Avoid controversy
If you know there are certain topics that are likely to cause disagreements or hurt feelings, do your best to avoid them. There’s no need to stir up drama during what is supposed to be a happy occasion. If someone does bring up a controversial topic, politely change the subject or excuse yourself from the conversation if necessary.
Focus on the positive
It’s easy to dwell on the negative when you’re around family members that you don’t always get along with. Instead of focusing on the things that bother you, try to focus on the positive aspects. There’s bound to be at least one thing that you enjoy about family events. Whether it’s the food, the conversation, or simply being around loved ones, focus on what makes the event special for you. Focusing on the positive will help improve your outlook and make the event more enjoyable for everyone involved.
Connect with others
The holidays are a great opportunity to connect with other family members, especially if you don’t see them often. Even if you need to make a game plan and think about who to talk to and what about. Its much better than sitting around in silence or only talking about surface-level topics. Try to engage in meaningful conversations with others. Ask them about their lives, their interests, and their thoughts on current events. You might be surprised at how much you have in common!
Entertain yourself
If you know you’ll be spending several hours with your family, why not take along your own entertainment in case you need to pass the time. Bring a book to read, download some shows on your tablet, or take a game or some cards to play (alone or with others). Having something to occupy your time will help make the event more bearable.
Family gatherings during the holidays can be stressful, but they don’t have to be! By following these tips, you can make it through any family event with your sanity intact. Just remember to focus on the positive and take things one step at a time. And try and be prepared for anything. You never know what might happen at a family gathering. Just remember that everyone is there for the same reason: because they care about each other. And that’s what really matters in the end. Happy holidays!
need more help with family members? Check out How to deal with a toxic parent, sibling, or other family member from Headspace.com.
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